Monday, March 23, 2015

Mail Box: Help! I am so stressed out and frustrated

Loving Big Families Mail Box
Here's a recent submission to the Loving Big Families Mail Box:

Hi-
I have 7 children all under the age of 10. I find myself extremely stressed out, frustrated, and run down all of the time. I love my children and my life but I am torn in so many directions throughout the day that I'm so overwhelmed. This makes me very stressed out, which causes me to become very frustrated with my children and I often find myself angry by the end of the day. I hate to admit it, but by the time the sun goes down, all I want is to be left alone. I don't want to feel this way. It's not fair to my kids, my husband, or myself. Help!

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,
All I can say, is you're not alone. It's a huge task caring for so many children and it's easy to find yourself stretched too thin. I understand how this can cause you to feel very stressed out and frustrated with the situation. It's easy to become so overwhelmed that you reach your breaking point.

For me, I have found the best way to overcome this is to learn to let go. It's ok if the house isn't spotless at the end of the night. It's ok if you don't make a gourmet meal every single night of the week. And, it's ok not to be there every waking moment for your children.

Too often we get caught up with trying to solve all of our children's problems and supervising constantly that we forget to let our children learn for their selves. I'm not saying to let them run around the neighborhood unsupervised, but you have to give them a little bit of independence to discover their own self. By doing so, you'll teach them valuable life lessons and give yourself a minute to breath.

Also, find time for yourself to do something you enjoy, even if that's just 10-30 minutes a day. When I find myself becoming overwhelmed, I grab my headphones and find a quiet place to listen to music for a couple of minutes to recharge.

When you feel yourself becoming overwhelmed, take a step back and let go of the things you can't control and simply let it be. Reset your priorities. If you find there is just too much to do and too little time, find areas that you can let slide. Instead of washing laundry every single day, make it every other day or every couple of days. Like I said, it's ok if your house isn't spotless every single day.

What matters most are your children and the time you have with them. So make it count.

Do you have any words of advice to offer this mama? How do you keep your stress levels down to a minimum?

Do you have a question or need advice? Submit it to the Loving Big Families Mail Box.

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